I offer a number of different wedding messages, one of which I hope will suit the couple and reflect their perspective on their relationship and marriage. If none of these are suitable, I will do my best to craft a message around a reading that is meaningful to you as a couple.

MESSAGE 1 - 1 Corinthians 13 - Religious/Christian

The Bible has a few words to say about love and Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians has some excellent advice, not just for people getting married but for all of us.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Verse 4 Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

Every relationship reaches the point where you need great patience for the other person and love is the fuel for that. You both look wonderful today and have stars in your eyes, but there will come a morning when one of you has drooled on the pillow and the other one has morning breath - and you’ll think hmmm, this is very real. But we know that love is not kept alive by romantic feelings but by a continued commitment to love one another. Love is not proud. Pride is the great enemy of relationships - when we won’t swallow our pride and admit we were wrong. At every wedding I do, I get the couple to practice a phrase that will come in incredibly useful in their marriage. The phrase is:
I’m sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me.
Let the congregation join in with you, as an expression of solidarity, since we all could probably do with saying this more often.
Ready - after me, I’m sorry, I was wrong, please forgive me.
Together:

It hurts, but it’s a good kind of hurt and it’s a healing balm in a relationship. It takes one person to lay down their arms, to cease hostilities and ask for forgiveness.

v5 Love is not rude it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love is not self-seeking. Love seeks first to serve the other. Leading by serving; putting the other person’s needs before your own. Love keeps no record of wrongs. Some people have a virtually supernatural memory of things you have done wrong that have hurt them - let it lie. Let the past remain in the past. No score-keeping. Forgive and forget as much as humanly possible.

v6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
Somebody once said that we can’t handle too much truth at once, especially if it is about ourselves. In the marriage relationship, the true you will be revealed - the good, the bad and the ugly. You will be a challenge to each other. How you respond will make the difference - you can become bitter about the challenge, or you can use it as an opportunity to grow in love and learn.

v7 - Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Marriage should be a safe harbor. When the world beats you up, when things may not be going well in your job, the home should be a sanctuary - a place where you can come and know that you are loved and accepted for who you are.
Accept one another as Christ accepted you. The marriage relationship is a picture of the relationship between Christ and the church. Christ loved the church and gave up his life for her - a demonstration that love involves sacrifice.

My prayer for you is that you will truly show the love of Christ to one another - not just today, but for the rest of your lives.

Amen.

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MESSAGE 2 - Non-Religious

True love requires patience.

True Love is not proud. Pride is the great enemy of relationships - when we won’t swallow our pride and admit we were wrong. At every wedding I do, I get the couple to practice a phrase that will come in incredibly useful in their marriage. The phrase is:

I’m sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me.

Let the people join in with you, as an expression of solidarity, since we all could probably do with saying this more often.

Ready - after me, I’m sorry, I was wrong, please forgive me.

Together:

It hurts, but it’s a good kind of hurt and it’s a healing balm in a relationship. It takes one person to lay down their arms, to cease hostilities and ask for forgiveness.

True Love supports and reveals.

Somebody once said that we can’t handle too much truth at once, especially if it is about ourselves. In the marriage relationship, the true you will be revealed - the good, the bad and the ugly. You will be a challenge to each other. How you respond will make the difference - you can become bitter about the challenge, or you can use it as an opportunity to grow in love and learn.

A Marriage of true love should be a safe harbor. When the world beats you up, when things may not be going well in your job, the home should be a sanctuary - a place where you can come and know that you are loved and accepted for who you are.

As your reading said, marriage is a promise, a potential. May you both live up to these wonderful promises you have made today, and bring out the greatest potential in each other, so long as you both shall live.

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MESSAGE 3 - Shakespeare's Sonnet 116

Sonnet 116

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no; it is an ever-fixed mark,
That looks on tempests, and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

Along with Shakespeare we must never admit impediments to our marriage. You both look wonderful today and have stars in your eyes, but there will come a day when you wake up, and one of you has drooled on the pillow, and the other has morning breath, and you will realize – this is very real. But we know that love is not kept alive by romantic feelings, but by a continued commitment to one another.

There will be attempted impediments to your marriage. It could be something as simple as work becoming too demanding and you find yourself spending less time together maintaining and growing your relationship. It could be something more dangerous, such as someone flirting with you and you needing to respond appropriately to that. Impediments and temptations may arise, and it’s important for you both to understand your role as guardians of this precious relationship.

Love does not alter when it alteration finds. In the marriage relationship, the true you will be revealed – the good, the bad and the ugly. And true love means you do not love less when something about your partner changes. Rather, the marriage relationship is supposed to be a safe and supportive environment where we can become all that we are intended to be.

Love looks on tempests and is never shaken. The marriage should be a sanctuary. When the world seems to be against you, when things may not be going well in your job, when other relationships seem rocky, home should be the place where we can come and know we are loved for who we truly are.

It is the star to every wandering bark,

Bark in this context means ship. Your love is the guiding star to your wandering ship. As a guide it can lead you to great decisions if you only ask the question, what will this do for our love? Decisions about career, where you live, what you do with your lives can all be guided by what it will mean for your love.

Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
It’s worth is unknown even though it could be measured, because no one can really tell you the value of your love. It depends on you both to continue nurturing the relationship. In Troilus and Cressida, Shakespeare says, “Things won are done. Joy’s soul lies in the doing.” In one sense [groom], it is done. You have won the maiden. But in a deeper sense, the love you have for each other is never done as you keep on building into it. This is “the doing” of love, not just the “done” of a wedding day. It’s the dozens of daily kindnesses that build love.

Love is not time’s fool. As we age, we can grow more beautiful together. We can encourage one another in our dreams and hopes for the future. We can know and treasure the little quirks and foibles that make our partner unique.

Love bears even until the edge of doom. At the end of your life, I hope you will be able to say to each other, “No one could have loved me like you loved me. No one could have cared like you cared.”